Don’t kill! A woman is never yours, Kijana - it is only your turn

[Photo: Courtesy]

I would like to address the current generation of men turned boys. We know life has not been fair. You probably have been brought up with tender gloves - unlike some of us whose parents set us free to roam the streets to harden up.  

It is very disappointing to hear the number of murders committed by young men. The big problem is the style of upbringing kids are exposed to - coupled with that nonsense that a boy should feel free to show emotions in public.

I come from the old school setting - where boys never cried in public, never fought with women. Even when love was unrequited, we took it in our stride and moved on. I kindly wish they all read Chinua Achebe’s novel, Things Fall Apart.

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I have advised young boys before, but they never seem to listen: A woman is never yours, it is only your turn. A woman matures faster than a man - which is why you should marry women not less than eight years younger than you.

I am not a marriage counsellor, but I am a street wise person. If you have a relationship with a girl in school or college, always escorting her to the bus stop or from a cheap outing, just enjoy while it lasts. The reason is that when she matures, someone who has a motor bike will come along, then a car or even a chopper.

So, when she moves on or dumps you, thank her for accommodating you and giving you experience, then soldier on like a man. Don’t kill her, man.

[Photo: Courtesy]

Stop this nonsense of getting obsessed by the so-called dream girls. Always remember that as you struggle to please her, there is a man somewhere who doesn’t even pick her calls no matter how much she nags.

Where did this hurrying to get married by the Boy Child come from?

Only consider marrying from your 33rd birthday. I can understand a woman has to rush due to that small matter of the biological clock. But what is the hurry when Mzee Jackson Kibor is still hitting it at 80-something? Francis Atwoli just bagged himself a young bride in his 70s. The common denominator between them is that they invested in themselves first and knew time was on their side.

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So, if you decide to take someone to school, pay their rent or take them to work overseas and you are dumped, please consider that as charity work and let it go. It is unfortunate that most young men are justifying violence with the amount of money they sent on their women.

I will remind the Boy Child that at their 20s, they should be bettering themselves and if you have more money then spoil your parents as you will finally learn that all women prefer comfort and they don’t eat love or romance for dinner. Food is bought with real otonglo.

[Photo: Courtesy]

Please boy child listen to a song by DDC Milimani Park called usitumie pesa kama fimbo. The message is first woo a woman and after jellying, money comes in. Most women will like you for what you are before they start thinking of money which they will think of eventually.

However, just know that if you have Sh10 million, a woman will have use for Sh9 million in under 30 seconds.   So, invest in yourself first and you will be the most handsome man on earth. Money will work for you or else you will be posting on your timeline how old men are marrying young women just because they have money.

Please “ukiwachwa, wachika!”  

[email protected]

@AineaOJiambo

 


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