Nairobi Nightlife is not always what it seems

Nairobi Nightlife
Photo: afritorial.com

About a week ago, two girls were detained in a Westlands club after failing to pay a Sh40,000 bill. They had been partying all night with two Nigerians who had invited them for a drink. At around 3am, the two gentlemen did a disappearing act, leaving behind the hefty bill with the two girls who did not have cash to pay. This is not the only dramatic thing that can happen.

1. Imaginary phone calls

When it comes to paying the bill, people have creative ways not to. One case in point is the person who ‘receives’ a phone call and has to leave to leave the room, to avoid paying the bill. This is especially so when someone asks for something expensive. Those left behind will be forced to pay the bill.

2. Too drunk to pay

You capitalise on having one too many drinks and ‘blacking out’, or at least that’s what everyone thinks. Some are genuinely drunk but there are those who pretend to be too drunk to escape paying. Someone else in the entourage has to pick up the tab or, if a lady, she has to have a conversation with her purse.

3. Opportunists

Many throng into their favourite club joints with the intention of drinking a few brown bottles and then they are off. That changes the minute they see a guy at the corner table downing an expensive whiskey or vodka bottle.

Like vultures, they pounce and are already making conversation with the poor lad who thinks they genuinely enjoy his company. They gulp down the liquor but when it’s time to pay up, they disappear.

4. Drink and dash

A group of guys prey on women who are alone at the club. They then get the woman or women to their table and ask them to order anything they would like. Afterwards, they pretend to go to the washrooms and disappear one person after another. The other friends will pretend to look for the others but will not return. The women are then left stranded and have to pay the bill.

5. Shots before clubbing

This is really common as people resort to buying cheap liquor, taking shots then going to the club to just dance. Sometimes they might buy just one bottle of beer or soda for the night there. These are those Kenyans that will not pay extra for anything that they know they can get at a cheaper price. Most will pass by their ‘ka-local’, grab half a litre of Vodka and lime juice, go to the house with the entourage and after downing the same, it’s time to go out, feeling buzzed.

6. Cutting costs

They will take a matatu to the club especially when meeting up the friends and will use the same to get home. Cost cutting they call it. However, since it may be important to show off in the company of girls. They make sure no one sees them disembarking from the matatu; they will use a cab for what may even be walking distance to the club.

7. Outfit swap

Common among the ladies. They will wear jeans, a basic T-shirt and flat shoes but upon reaching the club, they will change to a sexy short dress and high heels. This happens because they probably had to use public transportation to get to the club.

8. Tanked-up teetotaller

In every circle there is that one guy who says he doesn’t drink until the drinks are on the table and his blood starts boiling. He will drink his soda as he waits for the rest to get drunk and that’s when he makes his move. He asks one of the other guys to buy him at least two beers to see what happens to him when drunk.

After the two drinks, the guy puts on a show before he goes missing.

9. Provoke fights

Its mid-month, you are in a club but the lady you came with is a guzzler. You look for the slightest excuse to start a fight – an error in the billing, someone steps on you or the waiter taking long to get you drinks - and just like that you escape, the bill still outstanding.

10. Cab hopping

After a pleasant night out, it’s time to go home. The chic suddenly sees the error in her ways of being ‘fungwad’ and she decides to stop and ‘pick something’. Since it is a neighbourhood she knows well, she goes through one gate and out another, leaving the expectant friend waiting in the cab, who one hour later, has no option but to pay for the cab and accept that he got played.

About a week ago, two girls were detained in a Westlands club after failing to pay a Sh40,000 bill. They had been partying all night with two Nigerians who had invited them for a drink. At around 3am, the two gentlemen did a disappearing act, leaving behind the hefty bill with the two girls who did not have cash to pay. This is not the only dramatic thing that can happen.

1. Imaginary phone calls

When it comes to paying the bill, people have creative ways not to. One case in point is the person who ‘receives’ a phone call and has to leave to leave the room, to avoid paying the bill. This is especially so when someone asks for something expensive. Those left behind will be forced to pay the bill.

2. Too drunk to pay

You capitalise on having one too many drinks and ‘blacking out’, or at least that’s what everyone thinks. Some are genuinely drunk but there are those who pretend to be too drunk to escape paying. Someone else in the entourage has to pick up the tab or, if a lady, she has to have a conversation with her purse.

3. Opportunists

Many throng into their favourite club joints with the intention of drinking a few brown bottles and then they are off. That changes the minute they see a guy at the corner table downing an expensive whiskey or vodka bottle.

Like vultures, they pounce and are already making conversation with the poor lad who thinks they genuinely enjoy his company. They gulp down the liquor but when it’s time to pay up, they disappear.

4. Drink and dash

A group of guys prey on women who are alone at the club. They then get the woman or women to their table and ask them to order anything they would like. Afterwards, they pretend to go to the washrooms and disappear one person after another. The other friends will pretend to look for the others but will not return. The women are then left stranded and have to pay the bill.

5. Shots before clubbing

This is really common as people resort to buying cheap liquor, taking shots then going to the club to just dance. Sometimes they might buy just one bottle of beer or soda for the night there. These are those Kenyans that will not pay extra for anything that they know they can get at a cheaper price. Most will pass by their ‘ka-local’, grab half a litre of Vodka and lime juice, go to the house with the entourage and after downing the same, it’s time to go out, feeling buzzed.

6. Cutting costs

They will take a matatu to the club especially when meeting up the friends and will use the same to get home. Cost cutting they call it. However, since it may be important to show off in the company of girls. They make sure no one sees them disembarking from the matatu; they will use a cab for what may even be walking distance to the club.

7. Outfit swap

Common among the ladies. They will wear jeans, a basic T-shirt and flat shoes but upon reaching the club, they will change to a sexy short dress and high heels. This happens because they probably had to use public transportation to get to the club.

8. Tanked-up teetotaller

In every circle there is that one guy who says he doesn’t drink until the drinks are on the table and his blood starts boiling. He will drink his soda as he waits for the rest to get drunk and that’s when he makes his move. He asks one of the other guys to buy him at least two beers to see what happens to him when drunk.

After the two drinks, the guy puts on a show before he goes missing.

9. Provoke fights

Its mid-month, you are in a club but the lady you came with is a guzzler. You look for the slightest excuse to start a fight – an error in the billing, someone steps on you or the waiter taking long to get you drinks - and just like that you escape, the bill still outstanding.

10. Cab hopping

After a pleasant night out, it’s time to go home. The chic suddenly sees the error in her ways of being ‘fungwad’ and she decides to stop and ‘pick something’. Since it is a neighbourhood she knows well, she goes through one gate and out another, leaving the expectant friend waiting in the cab, who one hour later, has no option but to pay for the cab and accept that he got played.


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