Just the other day, a man in Narok eloped with his son’s girlfriend. He stayed with the girl in a lodging for weeks, only making technical appearances at his home.
After his cover was blown, the tale became the talk of town, with many people poking fun at certain types of men, accusing them of leading in infidelity.
They are notorious when it comes to horizontal acrobatics with married women. They are young, physically fit and attractive. This is because they practically live in the gym and are health conscious.
The stereotype of the woman cheating with her gym instructor is the subject of many discussions and movies.
These gym rats don’t make much effort; women throw themselves at them. You only need to see how some inappropriately touch the women, in the name of stretching or training them. Women have been reported to fight over their gym trainers.
These brothers are accused of taking advantage of women, especially the young ones, desperate for Instagram likes. With the growth of the modelling industry, especially in urban areas, snappers have a field day.
They know biting unemployment and the fact that many young women, mistakenly, think they can be models, make for rich pickings.
They know too well how desperate these girls are for pictures, including nudes, to create portfolios.
Just like anybody who offers a fix to an addict, these scoundrels are a hit with the women.
Female addicts will do anything, including offering sex, just to get their regular fix.
In neighbourhoods like Nairobi’s Kahawa Wendani, Roysambu, Nairobi West or Juja with abig population of university girls and young professionals just out of college, peddlers are popular darlings.
Besides their bad-boy demeanour and perception that they are financially ‘loaded’, some have been accused of tricking women into getting stoned or hammered together, only to end up in bed.
Rogue men of God understand the psychology of women and take advantage of this.
They know that women tend to be needy emotionally and are ever desperate for a caring, listening ear.
A good number of women respect their pastors and trust them more than they do their husbands.
They consider men of God a bigger source of authority than their hubbies. While narrating how his wife ended up in her pastor’s arms a while back, a Bungoma man told journalists how his wife would wait until after he had gone to work so she could prepare delicacies for a pastor at a nearby diocese. Never mind this was after feeding her man miserable meals.
Many women approach pastors with their guard lowered, assuming they are harmless, only for them to strike like pythons when least expected, especially during ‘private prayers’.
Lecturers and bosses
At a time and age when college or university grades determine how easy or tough, getting a job is, lecturers are small gods.
In their desperation for good grades, some female students will lure lecturers or vice versa. Same thing with job promotions.
If only a study was to be done on ‘sexually transmitted grades’ or job promotions, some boyfriends and husbands would faint in horror upon seeing results. Or fathers each time their daughters break the news, “Dad, I got the job”. Beware each time your woman starts talking endlessly about, “our lecturer this, our lecturer that”. Or punctuating her sentences with, “our boss this, our boss that”.
IT techs, movie guys
These shy geeks have a way of passing themselves off as supermen of sorts, especially when dealing with female ‘Team Clueless’.
Like their comrades in crime the movie guys, IT technicians’ solutions are not limited to laptops and related gadgetry.
They are very good with one software in women; their tender hearts. As you are busy tinkering with her hardware, these brothers work on her software, doing all those things you stopped doing in 1972, such as buying flowers, chocolates and all.
Also, be careful when unending back and forth calls about the latest movies and series start.
Also, be very careful with men whom your woman dismisses with a casual “we are just friends”.
They tend are friend zoned, but remain very lethal, like crocodiles lying in wait at water points in the wild. They feign disinterest, then strike when least expected. They masquerade as harmless creatures, but know everything about her, including when her man is acting up and when she is emotionally vulnerable and in need of ‘immoral support’.
Fake gay men
Like wolves in sheep clothing, these one fake it to gain women’ trust. Seeing as they pass themselves off as sexually harmless, women trust them and even treat them like one of them.
With time, ladies lower their guard around them, revealing their insecurities and exposing weakness.
Girls like freebies. Gifts, lifts, free lunch, outings... Ever wondered why touts know almost all ‘hot’ girls in the neighbourhood?
In fact, in most matatus, if you make the reckless assumption that the unoccupied front seat is up for grabs, you will be in for a rude shock. It is always preserved for estate ‘hotties’.
Alternatively, have you ever been in a matatu and the lady next to you pays half the price or even merely smiles back at the tout with knowing wink instead of paying?
Well, those touts are the reserve players for when boyfriends are sulking.