Village Casanova Forced To Marry A Girl He Impregnated

Village Cassanova

By Murimi Mwangi

A youngman from Rubari area in Kirinyaga Central, who is fond of fooling around with girls, has been forced to marry a girl he impregnated.

Congo, as he is popularly known, runs a ‘bakery’ and is famed for its tasty ngumus (a type of mandazi). Congo is a village celebrity of sorts, if the attention he gets, courtesy of his ngumus that fly off the shelves like hot cake, is anything to go by.

He recently got in trouble after his mother and the expectant girl’s parents made a unilateral decision to marry them after the girl allegedly dropped the bombshell to her parents; that she was pregnant with Congo’s baby.

He tried sweet-talking his mother into defending him, but she stood her ground and demanded that her daughter-in-law be brought to the homestead forthwith.

Ukimwikira ibu ni wabatii kumenya mukariaga mahiga kana geki icio urugaga (you should have known whether you will be eating stones or those cakes you cook before impregnating somebody’s daughter),” declared his mother.

Congo initially thought that his mother was teasing him and would later recant her words, considering she remained mute for days after without mentioning the issue.

He went back into his Casanova tactics and embarked on a seduction spree, which saw him bring a new girl every weekend to his wooden cubical. 

Apparently, he did not have to use any honey-coated lyrics, as his tasty cakes had done all the ice breaking mumbo jumbo and whatnot on his behalf.

Little did he know that the mother was closely monitoring his every move and secretly scheming to nip his flagrant promiscuity in the bud!

One afternoon as he returned from distributing his cakes, he was shocked to find the pregnant girl and her parents perched on wooden stools outside his mother’s house.

He contemplated vanishing to avoid taking responsibility, but later thought otherwise after probably realizing that he could run (and not for long) but couldn’t hide.

 “Nduke ukeithie mukaguo (come and greet your wife),” bellowed his mother as he noticed his son fidgeting from a distance.

The girl has since moved in with the young man who lives in a rickety wooden hovel. And with him now ‘officially’ married, other women with whom he has been fooling around with seem to have been sidelined, and now complain since the free ngumus offer has been terminated.

A resident told Crazy Monday that his mother got him a wife to tame his runaway immorality.

“This boy could be having a special charm causing women’s hearts to melt around here. I think his mother must have realised it and decided to save him because even married women have been yearning for his attention to ostensibly ‘taste his ngumu’ if you know what I mean,” said one Kunu, who claimed to be a close friend of Congo.